Her vs. Her: Maintaining Sisterhood Through Times of Competition
Introduction and History
Throughout history, our world has experienced conflict within our community. Living in a white and male-dominated world, we have had to fight for every seat at the table. We are so often pitted against each other by society. Even within the Civil Rights Movement, black women were frequently excluded. The exclusion of Black women led to the emergence of Black women-led movements and organizations, such as the National Association of Colored Women (NACW) and the Women's Political Council (WPC), which caused tension within the Black community. Colorism in our society has become an enormous problem. European propaganda has taught us that being closer to white is better. So colorism has become a big issue within the black community due to internalized hate. Our society measures us through the lens of whiteness, meaning that we are fighting a battle we can never win.
Competition is regular in all settings; however, we live in a society in which black women are pitted against each other. Our sisterhood is too sacred to let rivalry ruin it.
Shifting our Mindsets
Although it may seem that there is not enough space for us, we can create space. We do not have to push our sisters out of the way because we all deserve success, and we have a duty to support each other. There is room for all of us to shine. Whenever someone has a win, they are not winning for themselves, but for their whole community. Competition is more than just winning; it is about growing and improving from losses, and learning from your peers. Let's cultivate a culture of sharing opportunities, celebrating one another's successes, and affirming each other.
Collaborate, Not Compete
Join forces with your sisters. If you need help with your classes, projects, or relationship and friendship advice, they are here for you. Share advice, resources, and knowledge with your peers. We all share the same overall life goals: success, happiness, and fulfillment. We can help each other achieve those goals. You might be competing for the same roles, but sometimes we have to look beyond our goals and consider the person. Everything happens for a reason, so celebrate your wins and disappointments. We all have a unique journey, so embrace it.
Communicating Through Tension
Remember, we are all adults; it is our responsibility to address conflicts and find solutions when necessary. Even when we feel as though we cannot be vulnerable, being honest with ourselves and our peers shows strength. We need to normalize transparency and put friendship over competition. Communicate your feelings to yourself and others; focus not only on winning, but also on building long-lasting relationships, because friendship is always more important than winning. Collaborate, help each other grow, and succeed. Let’s turn competition into a partnership and win collectively as a community because any win for one of us is a win for all of us.
Practicing Self-Growth & Reflection
Remember to care for yourself instead of stressing over something you cannot control. Everyone has a different path, paved specifically for them. Focus on your personal growth and passions. Choose the path where you feel the most sucessful and loved. Find a community where, instead of feeling like an enemy, you feel like a peer. Please don’t be ashamed of yourself, and encourage others to feel confident and proud of themselves.
Conclusion
Competition is regular, but we must ensure that we prioritize our sisters. Sisterhood is always about choosing connections. Competition can help us grow as individuals, but let’s not let it tear us apart from one another. Celebrate all our wins and communicate with each other to manage tensions, rather than allowing conflicts to escalate. Celebrate you and your sisters' accomplishments and handle situations and disputes maturely. There is space for all of us to shine, so don't dim anyone’s glow, especially your glow. Let’s protect and nurture our sisterhood. When we all rise together, we can collectively change the world.
